You are what you eat

I do not have a history of eating well. Like everyone else I can't expect to lose weight without changing my diet. Here are some small changes that add up:

1. No High Fructose Corn Syrup.
They don't even let this shit on the market in Europe! Its such big industry in the US that the producers have bombarded us with 'research' and propaganda suggesting its fine. Bullshit. Its not fine. In addition to dubious nutritional value, it jacks up your body's natural satiation chemistry so you always feel hungry. Personally I think its an obvious reason why American kids are losing the battle to obesity (that and the rise of video game popularity, and ignorant parenting).  So be careful!  That HFCS shit is in everything - snacks, jams, drinks, maple syrup!??  F*ck that- DELETED!

2. No Hydrogenated Oils
This one is tough, as I love peanut butter. But your body doesn't know how to process hydrogenated oil. Nothing does. That's why they do it - that shit never spoils! Great! Indigestible food! Uh... pass. There are lots of great 'natural' peanut butter options available now.  Check ingredients tho - super misleading packaging at times.  Is it because I'm in marketing that I hate bullshit marketing tacticts so much?? o.0

3. Grapefruit
I hate grapefruit. Its like someone took a perfectly good orange and filled it with ear wax. But grapefruit is super healthy and helps burn fat. Life is not fair, so I peel and eat one every morning, making complainy faces. And don't cheat and cover it with sugar.  Or sugar substitutes;  all those chemicals excite your tongue and then just wander aimlessly through your body until they make cancer.  Seriously. 

4. Broccoli
I like broccoli, and its super good for you, I just don't dig the smell. Cooked broccoli smells like broccoli farts. Eating broccoli results in broccoli farts. If you come visit me, you might note everything smells like broccoli farts. Hey, you do what you gotta do... Unfortunately turns every attempt at a romantic evening in to the "Uncle Shane's Amazing Ass-Calliope Dutch Oven Adventure!"  Makes me laugh anyway...

5. No White Food
Again this one blows as I love the classic über crap American white bread, or even better, Hawaiian rolls.  But its nothing but empty calories and carbs.  Switch to whole grain everything including pasta.  But really you should be eating as colorful a diet as possible - as in fruits and veggies.  Munch on a raw carrot for a snack.  Do a Bugs Bunny impression like I do every time.  Hey, its the little things man....

6. No 'diet' anything
Diet soda?  Seriously the biggest joke ever played on the American consumer.  Why?  It makes you gain weight!  All that crap to fool your tongue in to thinking its getting something sweet is just a recipe for water retention.  On top of that the shit they put in those drinks are super unhealthy, and are known to do things like cause acute memory loss and blurred vision.  WTF??  Avoid sodas, all sodas, at all costs.  Uh, hey, here's an idea for hydration - water!  Duh.